Friday, April 8, 2011

Want Your A** Kissed? Here's How...

Kovas and I have kissed a lot of ass.  First it was each others.  And then, confident in our ass kissing skills, we branched out to kiss many a fine ass including Chris K, EMZ and many others.

I'd like to think we've gotten pretty good at it.  But for whatever reason, over the last few months we haven't done a lot of it.  That's about to change.

One problem, though.  We have no idea who's ass we should kiss.  Though anyone who has had their ass kissed by us can rest assured that the love is still in the air, we'd like to kiss some new asses.  So if you'd like yours kissed, then let us know by leaving a comment here.  And telling us why you want your ass kissed certainly won't hurt your chances.

Our decision on who's ass to kiss will be purely subjective.  The only parameter guiding our choice will be that there are no parameters.  We are going to pick whoever we feel like picking at the moment we decide to pick.  We might even pick a few people, who knows?

If we pick you, we'll kiss your ass for a week.  You are likely asking what exactly this means.  We have no idea.  That said, we are confident that you'll know your ass is being kissed when we are doing it.

By the way, if we don't pick you, please don't be disappointed - I'm sure each and every one of your backsides deserves a big ol' smooch.  But we can only kiss so much ass.

41 comments:

Jason said...

ass kissing is good, but that picture is hilarious. Did you just google red lips on ass? How did you find that picture. Funny stuff there.

Allison said...

I'm not above asking to get my ass kissed....I don't get enough of it in real life...so blogging ass kissing would be just fine. NOT to mention I have my first 70.3 next weekend...I think that deserves a little smooch don't you? Just no tounge please...that would be gross :)

Kovas said...

Well, I suppose they had their time in the sun. I was getting bored with their blogs anyway, seemed like mostly filler lately. Coasting, perhaps?

Christi said...

I love you guys. You just never know what you are getting from day to day. Perfect!

Teamarcia said...

I think you should spin the wheel of asses to see whose you should kiss.

Caratunk Girl said...

OH! Pick me! Because I am short and spunky and live in the freaking arctic tundra. And I have an awesome dog. Maybe you should kiss his ass instead?

I wonder what you guys have in store for the winner. This is like a giveaway.

Dash said...

HAHAHA. PUCKER UP

Shawn said...

Use Lip Balm please...no sense getting all chapped up!!!

And no double ass kissing...right?

Tri4Success said...

Please be careful to not disturb the anti-chaffing cream when you kiss my ass! Just completed my first multisport event and got ONE comment. I need to feel the love!

Amanda@runninghood said...

I'm really relieved to know that :"That said, we are confident that you'll know your ass is being kissed when we are doing it." I would hate to get my ass kissed and not know it. that would really spoil a good ass kissin

JessiePants said...

New to your blog and don't really need an ass-kissing, I did want to say how much I enjoyed the plentifulness of the use of the word "ass" in your post though. Truly one of my favorites...

TRI714 said...

Id rather be donkey punched in the junk than have my azz kissed by you schmucks ! Is that clear enough for you head cases !

XLMIC said...

I LOVE having my ass kissed. Especially if I get to be conscious while it's happening. And I love it that Kovas was so prompt in leaving a comment on my most recent post...
There are lots of reasons to kiss my ass. But my blog is not exclusively running. So you probably won't pick me :P And I can be annoying... but maybe that's a desirable quality?
And much as Beth had her 'tryst' with Dean, I have a celebrity 'connection' as well ;-) And also like her, I have a photo to show for it! lol And also like her, I can unabashedly make reference to it over and over and over.
But I don't have great abs. So I'm not like her or Emz. But I am 47 so I am like Chris K. But maybe I'm fitting the 'profile of ass-kissees past' to closely.

Kovas said...

Patrick, please go donkey-punch Craig in his junk, per his request.

I'm also thinking we may need a separate animal week for Bailey and Dash.

Haley @ Climb Run Lift Mom said...

Sweet! I can't turn down a good ass-kissing! I can't think of why I'd really deserve it, but maybe ya'll can tell me when your not too busy puckering up ;)

Kate said...

I suggest mine. For one, I'm raising teenagers, so my ass is sorely deserving of kissing just from remaining sane day to day. For two, I'm working hard to pull off my mild-mannered teacher to superhero transition. And last, in the year that I've been running, it's become a much tighter ass and therefore more pleasant to kiss than in the past.

Ulyana said...

I'm laughing so hard right now!!!!

And I don't know what's happening... so kiss my ass?

Jill said...

I like Marcia's Spin-the-wheel idea...but if Kate's stepping up to the plate, maybe she's deserving!

Chris K said...

Kovas nailed it. My Blog is nothing but filler. I like this idea. Can I suggest that EVERYONE kisses the winner's ass. They are inundated with it. Everyone who made a comment here is worthy. Except Kovas.

misszippy said...

I think I just came off a really low point in my life, and a little ass-kissing for my ability not to (totally) lose it while there is in order.

BabyWeightMyFatAss said...

Will it make my baby weight fat ass smaller?

Kovas said...

Chris, where's the love? And I'm not talking about the love you give yourself, that's neither desired nor appropriate.

RockStarTri said...

Just because you believe that you are good at ass kissin doesn't mean that you actually are. Realize in ChrisK's comment he never gave his experience as a kissee, just looking for quantity to potentially drown out Kovas efforts. Not a ringing endorsement...

RockStarTri said...

Just because you believe that you are good at ass kissin doesn't mean that you actually are. Realize in ChrisK's comment he never gave his experience as a kissee, just looking for quantity to potentially drown out Kovas efforts. Not a ringing endorsement...

Lesley @ racingitoff.com said...

You guys are hilarious. First, I'd like to say that unlike SUAR, I won't dart on you while you are kissing my ass. Unlike EMZ, you can actually catch my slow ass. And unfortunately, unlike Chris K, I won't be in a toga, so kissing my ass won't be *easy*. Currently my ass is shrinking, and I think it needs a little extra attention, especially since my husband works 600 miles from home.... this ass needs some attention.

Lesley @ racingitoff.com said...

That should say fart, not dart. What stupid autocorrect doesn't have fart in the dictionary???

Caroline said...

that is great and hilarious!!!
I am also not above getting my behind kissed! I mean come on I am Canadian I need all the help I can get right?!!!

Emz said...

I checked my a$s
then I check it again.

and
again
and again.

I see no markings.
WTH?

Adam said...

Begging for ass kissin is so 2009. I'm all about showing everyone my ass and letting the kisses fall where they might.

Michael said...

Yes, I would like some chocolate ass cream....I mean I would like my ass kissed! I don't know why or what that means, but why not it sounds interesting.

Her Name Is Rio said...

so, are you guys going to start a sign up sheet for this honor?

Julie said...

I'm pretty sure that I am not as worthy as some of the past recipiants but hey I could sure use some ass kissing about now.

Lauren said...

HILARIOUS! You guys should have your ass kissed : )

I am on the otherhand have no reason to have my ass kissed. There is nothing I can give you in return, and I am not a super star of any sort. Good luck though!

DRog said...

hahaha
totally hilarious
but realy lol @ Jason
would be frightened to do that search...at work anyway...

One Crazy Penguin said...

I'm throwing my name....er....ass into the hat.

My ass is totally worthy of being kissed. It's not only awesome, but it's bad. It's a badass.

Like what I did there?

Colleen said...

I'm always up for a good ass kissing - it would mean so much if it came from someone other than my husband who I love, but we all know he only does it because he has ulterior motives... :)

The Green Girl said...

I'm confused. Why does your kiss on the ass look like you wear lipstick?

Glenn Jones said...

I just don't think this would be complete without the obligatory LMFAO!

Sara said...

Awesome! Ha! You guys are great, and I always seem to learn A LOT from you! ;)

Candice @ I Have Run said...

I'm working on having a kiss-worthy a$$. Put on the lipstick!

Shannon (IronTexasMommy) said...

I would definitely be in for an a** massage vs. a kissing. So, if there's anyone qualified, my buns are game. 90 mile bike ride last weekend, followed by a half iron this weekend and now three final weeks of the build phase. 38 days until IMTX. I'm working my a** off and would love some extra bloggy love. :)

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