Wednesday, September 1, 2010
What a complete sucker I am. When I realized I was a lard ass and that it was time to do something about it, I began to spend countless hours sweating my butt off putting mile after mile behind me by swimming, biking and running. And it hasn't been cheap - bikes, running shoes, clothing, race fees, nutrition and the countless other pieces of gear that I have needed (or just wanted) have cost me a small fortune.
If I had only known about the Slim Tee. For $19.95 I could have had instant gratification and saved thousands of dollars. Instead of having to do all that work, the Slim Tee would have offered me a license to fake it. The Slim Tee would have also allowed me to take no real responsibility for my health. After all, the subtext of this commercial is that there's no shame in doing absolutely nothing to try and change your habits. Why waste time that can be put to better use by sitting on your ass when a smaller waist size can be achieved in seconds?
As to the other benefits of fitness:
Renewed self esteem? - Not worth the effort.
A real sense of accomplishment? - Overrated.
Good health that may lead to a longer, happier, life for you and loved ones? - Whatever. Pass me the cheese fries, (expletive). Because football season is starting. And if I've got my fat gut stuffed into a Slim Tee, I'll be able to flirt with the waitress at Chili's (as long as my face isn't stuck in the middle of a plate of nachos when she walks by).
I'm sorry, but I just don't get it. Actually, I do get it, I just wish it wasn't true. For me, losing 80 + pounds is way up there on my list of the all-time awesome things I've done, and it was more than worth the fight. If this product wasn't so pathetic, I'd be offended. And it's not even the shirt that really bothers me, it's the two minutes of complete BS dialog in the commercial. Strike when people are desperate and they will fall.
I read blogs every day written by people who are in the process of losing weight the honest way. And though we all struggle once in awhile, there is always one thing in common - no one EVER bitches about the work or complains about how losing weight sucks. People who are committed to good health tend to be really committed to good health. And with the commitment comes passion and the desire to help others. The Slim Tee doesn't come with new friends and a support group, that's for sure.
I'm preaching to the choir, but let's remember that compression garments are to help heal muscles thrashed from exercise and nothing else.