Thursday, December 2, 2010

Make Believe

Do any of you guys play make believe?

....Nah me either - that's kid's stuff.  But hypothetically speaking, here's how I would play if I did (in fact) play make believe.

Fabian Cancellara
1.  If I was riding my bike into a brutal headwind going about 2 miles an hour and happened to have shoe covers on, I'd pretend I was Fabian Cancellara and the shoe covers were actually part of a state-of-the-art time trial suit.  At least this would make 2 miles an hour feel like 3 miles an hour.







Tenzing Norgay
2.  If I was climbing a mountain but found myself exhausted within the last 1000 feet of the summit, I would pretend I was Tenzing Norgay on the first ascent of Everest.  Why Tenzing?  Because I'm fairly certain that he either beat Edmund Hillary to the top or saved his butt by pulling him up the final snowfield.



Kovas Palubinskas
3.  If I was running in the extreme cold and having a tough time of it, I would pretend I was Kovas Palubinskas and was wearing a ThermaJock.  Then I would be warm.  Everywhere.



 

Thomas Pynchon
4.  If I was staring at my computer trying to figure out what to post on the blog, I'd pretend I was Thomas Pynchon and attempt to dazzle you with an intricate story filled with equal parts science, conspiracy and paranoia.  But how would this play out?  Would I mix a high dose of vitamin B12 with a sports drink, start hallucinating and become convinced that there were poisonous snakes everywhere I ran?  Or worse, would the runner I just passed actually be a serial killer that had just turned around and was now following me?  And I might as well make the serial killer part of a super secret trail running society that's mission is to eradicate those who run on pavement.  Because this is what Pynchon would do if he wrote about endurance sports.

I know, this one's a little out there.  But then again, that's the beauty of make believe.

How would you play?  And I mean this hypothetically speaking, of course.

17 comments:

KovasP said...

First, I'm honored to be on this list. Second, I believe Fabian would have an electric assist if he was battling perky headwinds. Third, it's my understanding that noone can actually read Pynchon's work, so kudos on having a more coherent writing style.

RockStarTri said...

I'm amazed that you don't channel your inner Kovas for all 4, especially wearing the termabasket.

Anonymous said...

Just got here from Run with Jill.

I play make-believe during adventure races all the time :)

Jennifer said...

I play all the time, but usually I am just plain old me, a faster, stronger (and and taller) version of me. At the end of a hard long run when I am beat up and wishing for pancakes and Mexican food, I imagine I am finishing up a 100 miler through the Rockies. Or maybe racing across the dessert with secret package that needs to get delivered to the right person or the world will end like in some grandiose Hollywood style adventure drama. Yep, that's what I do...

Laura said...

Sometimes fantasizing I am in the Olympics or winning the marathon is the only thing that gets me through a tough run.
I'm also a rock star in my car and cannot carry a tune to save my life.

Christi said...

Whenever I am playing I am always winning!

Unknown said...

I think it is awesome you put together this entire post just to take a crack at Kovas and the thermajock -- Kudos Patrick!

Allison said...

When I'm running I pretend to be EMZ....seriously it's the only time I'll run THAT FAST and have THOSE ABS!

Caratunk Girl said...

So funny!! Nice one on Kovas! Ha ha.

Love the one on Tenzing Norgay - good one.

When I am running up my hill in town and it is dark and I am feeling lonely and cold and everyone else is inside watching TV, I pretend that it is that bitch of a hill at IMLP (232 days in case you were wondering) and that there is a crowd around me cheering me on. I am a psycho.

Jennifer said...

We need to play this game for running a half marathon in crazy-hot Hawaii weather after riding a bike for 56 miles. I think imagining that we're part of "Hawaii Five-O" is appropriate, chasing down criminals...

Jason said...

I am pretending to not see the Thermojock in my mind's eye anymore. Q, EMZ, Myself and now you have posted about this item and well let's just say I'm getting a bit scarred by it all.

Jill said...

Pretend to excel? I don't think I need to do that....

TRI714 said...

I would say "you have no idea", but apparently I would be wrong. On another note: Cancellera and some other studs to make serious strong team next season. Team name TBD soon I hope.

Quinton J said...

I'm not even going to make beleive. I'm just going to wear it...and be proud of it...maybe even show it off.

Unknown said...

You mean it's not normal to think about yourself being a super star? Oh... I don't do that either...

Barbie said...

If I could make believe to be someone else I would be Susie Moroney.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susie_Maroney

She is an awesome marathon swimmer.

Pretend this is real said...

3 miles an hour DOES feel fast sometimes.

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